There were many, many beautiful women and men present at the basketball presentation on Saturday. I was very happy to be working inside the bar. 

A group of tall handsome boys who called themselves the big v were very kind to helping me with the giving of the beers. I also meet the spicy mamasita Ms Crowley. The crowley helps me learn some very nice Australian words like spew, munt, snog and bozzle.

I vote very strong for the most fashion couple and decide that Jan Wong is most best dressed for the women. I also decide that the Justin Turnley wins most fashion for the men. This Justin Turnley would be many most beautiful in my home. It is my wish one day to introduce Justin to Fernando.

The awards were spoked by first man James. I stop the bar. I was confused when a hairy man was the best girlfriend. His boyfriend must be very happy.

I love the 'John Bayliss' award best. My new friend Hugh James wins the most best award with many good stories of how he serviced the girls.

I also love the 'Scott Cuffe' award. He wins the life membership. I think this Scott must have many good stories. I think he is very lucky when I see him leave with the Justin.

I have lovely meetings in the night with the Anj, the Sophie and Kylie. They negotiate very hard and make me work for my money. I show them though. I take half hour siesta during drink special when they are not looking.

I collect many, many empty bottles. Together, night run smoothly. Except when girl spewed in bathroom.

And remember, in the words of ricky martin,
"Puede ser un símbolo sexual a través de la música o el cine. Hey, hay algunos políticos que son símbolos sexuales. Es algo que debe luchar? No. El sexo es muy natural."

I look forward to pouring with you your next drink!

Editors note:
Read more about the awards presented at the 'Presentation Night Wrap Up' news story